Storm's 4th Birthday Review @ the Emporium

Storm @ The Emporium image
Coalville, Leicester - 13 March 2004

You would be forgiven for thinking that spring had come early on Saturday 13 March, as Duracell Bunnies from across the country bounced towards Coalville.

Hard House was the name of the game as Storm’s 4th Birthday shook the Emporium into action! As soon as we entered the club, we knew we were in for a wacky night. The interior was draped in army camouflage but it was far from a disciplined affair... The DJ box was aptly named ‘The Officers Mess’ as commanding tunes grabbed our attention with tough, heady beats.

We moved into the second, smaller room for a dose of something a little bit bouncier. The heat was on as clubbers clad in furry bras and hotpants joined with funky-fashioned revellers in a frenzied flurry of fancy footwork.

Tara Reynolds took to the decks to take control over the shenanigans, spinning our heads through her speedy soundwave.

Later into the night, Jon Doe read the crowd with the aptitude of a psychic, as he DJ'ed in the mainroom alongside Nick Lunn. The melodic marriage of skilful scratching and trippy breakbeats put a fresh jagged edge on the night and soon had us bopping like the ultimate spring chickens.

During this set we were perplexed as ‘scientists’ came on stage and injected fluorescent liquid into tubes attached to a figure dressed in a skin-tight black outfit, in order to animate the strange character. For some reason, hard house provokes the weirdest stage shows!

Stilt walkers wearing nurses uniforms, and later, big wigs and union-jack clothing, added to this surreal element.

As Jon Doe and Nick Lunn worked the crowd, I squinted to see a notice behind them which stated something to the effect of ‘All privates stand to attention when ladies are present’… I’ll let you figure that one out for yourselves….

The event continued into the small hours of Sunday morning with the likes of the Tidy Boys, Ian M and Andy Farley who all added their fast-paced vivacious vibes to the hyperactive atmosphere.

Storm’s Birthday certainly was an assault course for the senses as clubbers ensured that the candles in the army camp were burnt at both ends.

Reviewed by Loz

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